Today's already the 26th of June. It's been 22 days since you left England. Tears still well up as I remember that day. Sometimes I'm fine. I feel as if you were just one of those scatty jerk ex boyfriend every girl is supposed to have. But then sometimes, I get this horrible feeling, my heart feels like it's being crushed and it's painful to even think you're never coming back into my life again. The fact that it's been 3 weeks since I shamelessly declared my love for you in that stupid letter and there's still no response from you, hurts. I guess you didn't feel the same and I can't force you to have the same feelings. Even though you were a pretty shit boyfriend, you still made me happy. The fucking screwed up times melt away when I think how happy you made me. I still say your name with a big smile. I honestly wish I can rewind back time, not to change what happened but to relive in that happiness. Something I'm struggling to find at the moment. I just want you to wrap your arms around my waist one more time and never let me go.