I'm trying to sleep early for once but I don't seem to be able to. I remember how I used to feel sleepy all the time, but I refused to miss out on all the fun so I would be a stubborn bitch and refused to go to bed with you, even though you were tired too. You would sit there trying to persuade me to go to upstairs. You would be all childish and sulk when I said I was fine. You'd then lean on me and rest your head on my shoulder and bite me occasionally to remind me that you existed. Or you would pull me close and hug me like a child would hug their teddy bear, kissing my head, then closing your eyes and resting your chin on my head. Then when you caught me dozing off, you'd be a bitch and be like "well I'm going to bed now", pretending to abandon me, then you'd ask if I was staying and take my hand to take me upstairs. But as soon as we left the living room, you always seemed to regain your energy, whilst I felt like a zombie... Suspicious. Very suspicious. Then walking down the corridor to your room, you would always surprise me every time. You'd come hug me from behind and kiss me or you'd push me against the wall and trap me, so you could see my face. Then you'd offer to carry me upstairs and I would say no because I might look small but I carry a LOT of weight. Then you'd make me walk up the stairs first but I saw through your plan of checking out my ass so I'd force you to go first, slapping and wolf whistling at yours. Then you would open that broken door of yours and we would both shuffle in your tiny ass room and I would jump on your bed, shotgunning most of the space, whilst you'd be tidying some shit and finding me your shirt that was mine. One that you took from your dad and was super soft. Then we would get changed like teenagers in a changing room, not looking at each other but sneaking little peeks and climb into bed. Me on the left next to your wardrobe and you on the right, next to your laptop. You would probably roll up a joint, whilst putting on a movie, whilst I would be asking you questions like a little kid. Then you'd smoke up your joint, playing with my hair whilst I played with your chest and snail trail. Sometimes I would fall asleep before you finished the joint and wake up as you tried to lay me down to sleep properly. Or if I rolled to the side whilst you watched the film, you would keep a hand on my waist and then spoon me from behind when you felt tired. You'd gently caress my cheeks and kiss me goodnight, waking me up and I'd roll over so I could kiss you goodnight properly. 

I really miss those days. I really miss you.